What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer!
Why did the man run around his bed? Because he was trying to catch up on his sleep!
What did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt!
Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building? Of course! The Empire State Building can’t jump!
Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers? He’ll stop at nothing to avoid them.
Why do dragons sleep during the day? So they can fight knights!
I’m afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered.
I thought the dryer was shrinking my clothes. Turns out it was the refrigerator all along
What did one wall say to the other? I’ll meet you at the corner
Where do young trees go to learn? Elementree school
What happens when a strawberry gets run over crossing the street? Traffic jam
Why does Humpty Dumpty love autumn? Because he had a great fall
What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop
Which is faster, hot or cold? Hot, because you can catch cold
What type of bees make milk? Boo-bees
What did the swordfish say to the marlin? You’re looking sharp.
I told my physical therapist that I broke my arm in two places. He told me to stop […]